Battle of Frustration City 3

1750 point 40k battle betwen Eldar and Tau.

G$’s army:
Didn’t keep a record of it, but from memory it went something like this.
Farseer on Jetbike with 2 Warlock ablative wounds
Steve (Avatar of Khaine)
Wave Serpent
5 Pathfinders (hereafter referred to as Rangers, so there’s no confusion over whose Pathfinders are being written about)
6 Wraithguard with Warlock
15? Dire Avengers with weapon platform
15? Dire Avengers

My army:
Tooled up Commander with Plasma/Fusion, Shield Generator, Stimulant Injector, 2 Shield Drones. Theoretically indestructible.
5 Stealth Suits, one with Fusion
3 Fireknife Crisis Suits (Missile/Plasma)
2 Sunforge Crisis Suits (TL Fusion/Flamer)
12 Fire Warriors
12 Fire Warriors
6 Fire Warriors
7 Pathfinders with Devilfish
2 Hammerheads with Railguns
2 Broadsides each with a Shield Drone

Here’s the battle ground:

Rolled for Traits.
G$ gained Outflank for his Farseer and unit, but as he had no reserves it did nothing.
I got the one that causes -1 on the enemy’s reserve rolls. As useful as G$’s!

Mission was Crusade (Objectives). Rolled for Vanguard deployment but we changed that to long edges as I have only played Vanguard in 6th edition up until last night!

I deployed first. The pile of Stealth Suits collapsed on the ground towards the left of the table were Infltrators I hadn’t set up yet.

G$ didn’t get initiative so I went first.

Turn 1, Me:
Having Infiltrated my Stealth Suits in the ruins to the left they moved up and took pot shots at the Farseer unit. A casualty was caused and one of the ablative Warlocks died. The Suits of course, jumped back in the assault phase.

Glanced the Wave Serpent with a Hammerhead, killed a single Wraithguard, and took out 2 Dire Avengers.

Turn 1, G$:
Farseer zipped up and used Psychic Scream (whatever it’s called) and killed three Stealth Suits without even trying. The other two died by being totally incapable of rolling anything helpful on my part. First Blood to G$.

Rangers took out a Broadside and Shield Drone. The remaining dude succeeded a Morale check so stayed on the board.

One Kroot died from maybe the Vyper?

Turn 2, Me:
Fire Warriors at the bottom left of the table managed to shoot down the Vyper parked on top of the bastion.

Wave Serpent bit the big one.

Deep struck the Commander onto the table. A 10” scatter directly towards the Wraithguard meant that he was predictably dead on G$’s turn. Deep struck the Fireknives down on the other side of the Wraithguard to try and give him a chance at survival. A total of four rapid firing plasma rifles, a fusion blaster and three missile pods fired. G$ rolled about six 5+ cover saves and NOT A SINGLE F**KING MODEL DIED.

Turn 2, G$:
Rangers sniped the last Broadside with 2 focused fire rending shots.

Wraithguard unloaded at the Fireknives and obliterated them. Of course, they couldn’t roll a cover saves to literally save their lives.

Commander, of course, died courtesy of the Wraithlord. With 2 Shield Drones and a 4+ invulnerable save he is without a doubt the easiest model to kill for obvious reasons (ie, my rolling).

Farseer jumped forward and did that psychic face rape on the Fire Warriors in the bottom left corner. 3 died. Surprisingly they didn’t break and run away.

Steve hit, massacred, then over-ran the 16 Kroot.

Turn 3, Me:
A massive turn for me, with a single wound caused against Steve and four Dive Avengers taken out.

Turn 3, G$:
Steve moved up and wiped the floor with the Pathfinders. Farseer bounced forward again and blitzed the Fire Warriors again. Unit was reduced to 5 men.

Turn 4, Me:
Lost interest in keeping track of the game. There was no purpose to from here on in. For some unfathomable reason, Scumcleaner and G$ insisted on telling me that I still had a chance. I suppose they just ignore the fact that I can only roll 1 or 2 on dice. Of course, by the end of Turn 5 I had not a single opportunity to even draw, with 5 Fire Warriors left standing next to the Wraithlord, and the Devilfish pretending to deny an objective on the other side of the table. Whoop-de-do!

“Highlights” of the game:

  • Turn 4 saw my Sunforge Crisis Suits come down and Flamer the entire Ranger unit (who was on the move to grab an objective) and the remaining Warlock on Jetbike. That was nice. Naturally they were boned afterwards.
  • Two Hammerheads shooting at the Wraithlord, both hitting, both rolling 1 to wound. Surprised? I wasn’t.
  • G$ added up the number of saves that Steve had passed. 20. He failed 3 and lived to the end.

I like the Tau and think they had a chance, unfortunately I was rolling the dice. Nothing worked. The game itself is good (gasp!), the army has a lot of potential, but I just never get a break when it comes to luck.

Apologies to G$ and Scumcleaner for my increasingly negative attitude on the night. I just can’t conceive how it’s possible to remain positive when NOTHING F**KING WORKS. It’s not like I was even playing poorly either (I probably could have done a couple of things different but the result would have been the same). I can’t get better at the game simply because I have no control over the dice. When there is historical evidence of a pattern of awful rolls on my behalf, and good rolls on my opponent’s, I just don’t know how a person is able to avoid being frustrated and disheartened. Sure it’s just a game, but FFS, let me at least roll average!

Death incarnate:

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3 thoughts on “Battle of Frustration City

  • yogozuno

    There is only one solution. Get new dice…

    As someone else with really bad dice kharma, I can thoroughly recommend getting new dice – if nothing else, it gives you hope again, for at least a short period of time.

  • Snorted corn chip

    Luc, mate.

    I actually started reading this article think it was MB playing with the Tau.

    I got as far as Tau 3rd turn and LITTERALLY said “wait, this sounds like someone else entirely.” I was of course correct.

    I wave my fist at the dice gods on your behalf, but I’m afraid there’s nothing else i can do.

    How the fuzz G$ and scumcleaner held it together is beyond me. My sympathy would have been rolling on the floor next to me!

    Condolences bloke.